Kanjani8's Big Plan to Save the Planet " Can! Jani " ~ We will do anything possible! Episode 1

LOL. long title is long.
I will say the usual verbatim - I am not fluent in Japanese god do I wish I was. This is a SUMMARY of the episode, with random translated bits so that you, the one that has no understanding of Japanese, can understand or get an general idea of WTF is going on.

Why is Hina screaming?
WTF is that can actually saying?
WTF are they doing in the middle of no where?

These questions will be answered in the following summary... Also, if I was to translate the entire thing I might as well sub it. So this is better, quicker, and easier on me.

Sit back, relax, and enjoy this thing...



So the show opens up with Hina introducing it:

Hina: So, let's start our new program, " Can! Jani " !! Because of all the special programs
Command Can: STOP DO IT!
Hina: Stop do itto?
Can: STOP DO IT!

Everyone looks around like they just heard Jesus or something, lololol.

Can: Why are you guys starting it in that type of way?! Can't you guys talk?!
Yoko: Who is this? This is crazy...
Can: Yokoyama. Yokoyama.
Yoko: Yes?
Can: Whenever I see you on programs, you always talk alot
Yoko</strong>: lol
Can: You know? Anyway...

That was lulz... anyway the can starts talking and then,

Can: We decided to bring everyone together for this program.
Hina: Yes
Yoko: We know.
Can: Big, big, large gathering. Alright?
Subaru: Big Gathering XD

The joke here is more on the play on words, Choodai choodai Shuuchuu chodai. I think, someone correct me on that. That line was pretty hard to get. Anyway, moving on~

Can: Why was this program given this title " Can! Jani "?
Yoko: Because its a play on us.
Can: You guys were selected to save the earth from a crisis, you seven... So you are called Defense 7!

Of course everyone is like lol wtf

Can: Come on, come on. Defense 7.
Ryo: What is a " kamon "? <-- LOL
Can: Come on Defense 7!
Subaru: He wants us to say it?
Hina: He wants us to say it together.
Subaru: Together?
Can: Together!
Eito: Defense 7!
Can: You guys didn't put any feeling into that at all >:|

He then says something but stumbled over the words so none of them got it, especially Hina. But its marked that he stumbled over his words.

Can: That's why this program is where you use your powers to save per-- people.
Subaru: You're stumbling XD

And then then the Can says more random things like " There's a product called chewing gum " and Hina's like ENOUGH ALREADY!!

Can: And so this program is about you guys using your power to help people!
Eito: Right.
Can: THAT'S WHY it's " Can! Jani "

And I would like to mark that I love that opening sequence and song :Subaru</strong>:

Can: You guys have been busy lately.
Hina: Yes, yes, dramas and stuff.
Yoko: You can say we've been slightly...
Can: Yes, yes~ Like Ohkura's drama which has taken off~
Tacchon: Thank you very much.
Can: I watched it.
Tacchon: Thank you.
Can: The wife really loves you.

Then its marked that the can is actually married with a wife. XD Hina lawls.

Can: Any of you guys tired?
Hina: No, everyone's fine.
Can: Yokoyama, you can't possibly be tired~
Yoko: To tell you the truth, I've been getting tired with this opening sequence~
Can: Nice! That's really nice. That was really clever. Very cleaver of you, Yokoyama!

And so the first mission " To find nature's mystical osen/hot spring "

So they talk about Osens and what's required for it to be an osen and then some history lesson about the world's oldest osen and all this other boring crap no one cares about cause we care about watching our idols suffer in the woods \:D/

So they send Hina and Ryo off to find this mystical osen off in Kajiyama, and they're dropped off at Itoyokawa Station, about an hour's drive away by car, with a hiking set a GPS, and good luck as they have to literally " search " for this osen.

Hina: So we've finally arrived in Nigata prefecture, Itoyokawa. To say... we've came to search for the mystical osen at Kajiyama Motoyu. Not even 1% have found this osen.
Ryo: Well, what are we supposed to do about that?

The sign: It's to let the world know...

Hina: Ah, your backpack.
Ryo: Yeah. It's kind of heavy....

So they go in and check what's actually in there. Got stuff to chill at the osen with, the towel and bucket thing and inside of that

Hina: What is this?
Ryo: I think its a GPS.

So they turn it on and they go OMG GPS and stuff and like LOL AMAZING like they never seen one before.

And then they find survival books...

Ryo: Mushrooms.. poisonous mushrooms... You can't eat that!
Hina: So, shall we find it?
Ryo: Let's find it.

So they start their journey, then they run into an old lady who doesn't quite know what they're talking about but shows them to a neighbor that does who then shows them to another neighbor who knows what they're talking about and takes them to their house where they talk to the husband who says he knows and he'll gladly take them over to the mountain so they can find that osen!

So they're in the car with the old man and Hina strikes conversation.

Hina: Do you know the name Kanjani8?
Old man: My son probably has heard of that name.
Hina: Do you know SMAP?
Old man: I've heard of SMAP.
Hina: It'd be great if you could please remember Kanjani8.
Old man: There's something below...

LOL. Hina and Ryo start laughing cause the man is totally not listening to what they're saying LOL XD

So they reach a sign that says they're close to Kajiyama after driving for 20 minutes and then 40 minutes into the trip they finally reach their destination, but... it ends up being the wrong mountain.

Hina: We're trying to find the Kajiyama Motoyu...
Woman: Oh, there's a Kajiyama Motoyu.
Hina: Oh! Really?
Woman: It's close by... ne...
Hina: What?
Woman: It's not easy to get there... lol.
Ryo: What?
Woman: This is the new Kajiyama spring.
Ryo: Hun?
Hina: What do you mean?
Woman: The old spring is in a different area.
Ryo: Are you serious?
Woman: Its a short drive to get there, but if you walk its two hours.
Hina: WHAT?! A TWO HOUR WALK?!

So the woman gets her manager to help them out and he comes out in a track suit, lol pimp, and Hina askes them is it possible to get to the old osen and the manager tells them its impossible.

Hina: Eh? Impossible?!
Ryo: Are you serious?
Hina: Are there snakes?
Manager: Yeah, there's snakes. Vipers.
Ryo: Well, what should we do?
Hina: You won't come with us?!
Manager: Well, today I have a lot of work...
Hina: Just for a little bit...
Subaru: He totally doesn't want to go.
Ryo: Are you serious ?

So the manager decides to escort them to the mountain!

So they talk about the type of osen it is and the man mentions it's been around for about 250 years Hina:since people discovered it) and all this other stuff and then Ryo askes how many months has it been since someone's been there and the manager goes, how many months? Don't you mean how many years! So Ryo's more WTF about it.

Ryo: You're lying!

So the manager stops the car to show them a viper he killed the other day. So Hina's freaking out.

Hina: What are you doing?! That's scary! Scary!
Manager: Pull up your sleeve.

So he takes the dead viper and tries to make it bite him.

Hina: Uwah!! Old man, please! Don't bring that thing near me! Please!
Old man: This is if you get biten.

So he shows them if they get biten by a viper, this thing that they should put on their wound so it can suck the poison out immediately.

Ryo: It's sucking!
Hina: How long after you get biten do you die?
Manager: Immediately.
Subaru: You'll die immediately?!! Is okay?!
Yoko: Then what's the purpose to the syringe?!

Can I mention to you guys that I am loving the random Psycho soundtrack being played in this episode.

So they finally reach the mountain and the place where they have to start their adventure and of course Ryo's complaining:

Ryo: There's no trail!

So the man explains to them that they need to follow a black hose to get to the osen, and that if time begins to run out or if they can't find the hose anymore they need to hurry back. They have only until 5:55 to get to the osen and its currently 2pm.

Manager: Good luck.
Ryo: ... D:... ?
Manager: *shakes his hand*
Ryo: D:? *shakes*
Screen: Why the handshake?

Ryo: There's no vipers here?
Manager: Who know's...
Ryo: Why do I have to be the lead?! Someone else do it! There's bugs everwhere! I'm tired of -- Hun?!

Hina's just letting him ramble as he walks into the woods complaining until he realizes they're not following and its lulz XD

Ryo: Come on, hurry up. I felt alone, talking by myself....

So it starts the rain real hard on them and doesn't let up... and Ryo gives up being the leader.

Ryo: We really have to go in here?
Hina: Do you want me to be the lead?
Ryo: Can you?

So Hina quickly switches with him XD

Ryo: I definitely could not be a settler.

Hina: Ow, ow! Ow! It hurts!

Ryo: Do we really have to do this?! I'm going to get sick!!

So Hina's on a mission and starts chopping down trees and being all GAR MANLY MAN.

Maru: Haha, so strong.
Yoko: He moves like a Gorilla. XD
Ryo: Murakami-kun is really strong ♥

So they continue and continue and they find the black hose and they think they're almost there so they're real excited.

Subaru: It's like a big adventure.
Yoko: Like Indiana Jones!

Then...

Hina: Danger! Danger! Watch out! Watch out! Watch out!! Bye bye! Bye bye!! Bye!!!

LOL All I kept thinking was Aibaka. VERY DANGER XDDDD

The music they use in this show are hilarious.

So anyway, they run into a major problem.

Hina: We have to go back around 5:30, right?
Ryo: 5:30? What time is it... I have it... It's around 4:20...
Hina: It's impossible. We have to go back.
Ryo: We won't go back! If we go back now then who knows what's going to happen <-- I believe, I probably misunderstood. Anyway, staff intervienes between Ryo and Hina's little debate of whether to go back or not.

Staff: That's enough for today.
Hina: Enough for today? ... So that's it?
Staff: We'll do this tomorrow.

So that's it for this episode, next week -> Do they find this osen or not?


Hope you guys enjoyed! I'mma go to bed now~~~